79 People Confess The Terrible Things They Did As Kids That They Still Regret As Adults
From saying something awful to another kid to accidentally harming an innocent animal, we’ve gathered some of the most honest responses that people shared confessing to what they did as children that they will never forget. Be sure to upvote the answers that you find most powerful, and then let us know in the comments if there is anything from your childhood that you would like to get off your chest. And if you’re interested in another Bored Panda piece featuring people confessing to shocking things, check out this story next.
#1In my first act of teenage attitude/rebellion I mocked my father's suicide attempt from a few months earlier. I was 12 and it felt good to be mean to someone that had hurt me emotionally in such a way. That was the last time we spoke. I didn't realize he was calling to say goodbye. He tried again and succeeded that night.
Image credits: righthanddan
We can’t all be angels as children. Sometimes we need to know what it feels like to be bad or learn lessons the hard way. In fact, according to Julie Lythcott-Haims, author of the book How to Raise an Adult, there are plenty of things that feel awful in the moment that might be valuable experiences for children to have. She explains that letting kids fail and make mistakes teaches them how to handle difficult situations and prepares them for future disappointments. And while many of these won’t happen to every kid, Lythcott-Haims breaks down her top 20 experiences that parents should let their children have.
The list of difficult experiences kids might face includes: not being invited to a birthday party, the death of a pet, breaking a valuable item, working hard on a paper and still getting a bad grade, having a car break down away from home, seeing the tree they planted die, being told a class or camp is full, getting detention, missing a TV show because they were helping Grandma, having a fender bender, being blamed for something they didn’t do, having an event canceled because someone else misbehaved, being fired from a job, not making the varsity team, coming in last at something, being hit by another kid, rejecting something they have been taught, deeply regretting something they can’t take back, not being invited when friends are hanging out, and being picked last for kickball.
#2Giving a hate letter in middle school to a teacher (who btw looked quite depressed) because my, at the time friend, hated him.
I feel so bad about that to this day.
Image credits: gxlia
#3I used to get excited on a sunny day because I'd go in the garden with a magnifying glass and make insects explode. So f*****g cruel.
Image credits: Jeggasyn
No parent wants their kid to have hard times, but Lythcott-Haims explains that the parent’s job is to be there for support, not to shield them. “We've been given the awesome, humbling task of helping a young human unfold," she says. "What they need most of all is our love and support as they go about the hard and joyful work of learning the skills and mindsets needed to be a thriving, successful adult."
Wendy Mogel, author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, makes a similar point in her book, “Even though our impulse is to protect and prevent upset, we must step back, muzzle ourselves, and sit on our hands—whatever it takes so that they can figure out that they are capable of handling their discomfort, devising solutions, and moving on." Even if a child remembers a situation for the rest of their life, it taught them something. And that is valuable.
#4Stole some money out of teacher’s purse. S**t still haunts me 30+ years later. They make so little and it probably had a significant impact.
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#5Once I tied a kid to a lamppost with a jump rope and just left. I feel bad about that every couple of months
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#6I put itching powder on a little girl on the bus...she had an allergic reaction and lost patches of hair.
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We can’t all be angels as children. In fact, most of us aren’t. It is totally normal for kids to experiment and play and test the limits of what they can get away with. I remember my brother stealing a toy from an amusement park when he was about 5 years old, and my parents were horrified when they discovered it later. But he didn’t mean any harm. He saw something he wanted, and he took it. And he did not grow up to become a hardened criminal or someone with no regard for the law. It was just a lesson that he had to learn. After hearing a mouthful from my parents, he never stole anything else ever again.
While some behaviors might be normal for all kids, the ways in which they tend to rebel depends on their age. Karen Young breaks down some of the most common problems to expect as your kids develop in her article “Phew! It’s Normal. An Age by Age Guide for What to Expect From Kids & Teens – And What They Need From Us”, so you can put your mind at ease if you are guilty about doing any of these things or if you notice your young ones doing them.
#7Hitting a neighbor kid with a baseball bat in the head for calling my mom fat.
I was 5.
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#8I was playing Sesame Street figures with another kid, his toys. We were both 5.
For whatever reason I really wanted to keep his Count Dracula, but I couldn't just take it straight up. So I got this great idea that I would throw it up in the air until I got it stuck in the tree. Kid was freaking out on me, and I just kept throwing. I succeeded and in a fit he grabbed all his toys and ran home with them.
It then occurred to me that there's no way I could get it either. So I went home too.
Couple of weeks later I am outside wandering aimlessly. It was a windy cold day. Then all of a sudden the Count fell right in front of me. I was so excited I grabbed the toy and ran to the kid's home. His parents answered and I was so excited I was like "is so and so home, I found his toy!!!!"
They both were sad looking and took the toy as they said "no".
Later found out when I was a teen that the kid died of cancer. My sister had a heart condition, and we just happen to live in this cheap apartment complex near the hospital. All those friends of mine were all sick kids.
Anyways, I pestered his parents for the longest time always asking if so and so could play and when he was coming back. I was too young to realize what was going on.
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#9My grandfather passed away when my dad was in his early 20s in the 80s. My dad had an old voice recorder that he kept in his sock drawer with a little cassette. The cassette had the only recording of my grandfather’s voice on it. A few seconds at the beginning of the empty tape of him going “1 2 3 test 1 2 3 test”.
Well anyways, at some point being a little adhd child, I recorded over it with some b******t.
Still feel terrible about that
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Karen explains that once a kid becomes about seven years old, they might feel misunderstood by other people. It’s common for them to complain about anything from their parents to rules to their friends and other kids. They tend to dramatize situations, and might become angry or frustrated when they’re upset. When they turn eight, their mindset might become even more black and white about what is good and bad or right and wrong.
Having little tolerance for opinions that differ from their own can definitely lead them to say things they might regret, if they are too passionate and speak before thinking. They can be very quick to start an argument, so treat kids this age with lots of patience. “With their black and white thinking, an argument will just mean that someone is right (them) and someone is wrong (you). Instead, ask them to explain their point of view and encourage them to see things from different angles,” Karen writes.
#10When I was in middle school, my girlfriend at the time had a little mother in law cottage in their backyard that they used to rent out to local college students. They were remodeling the only bathroom in there over a few months, so while it was vacant she'd hang out with her girlfriends in there all night on weekends. And inevitably somebody would need to use the bathroom, which would require them to walk through the backyard to the main house.
I thought it would be hilarious if me and a few friends, instead of straight showing up, hid in the bushes with our t-shirts tied over our face like ninja masks, and jump out to jump scare them on the way to the bathroom.
So it's pitch black, we are waiting in the bushes by the entrance to the actual house, and a victim finally decides to make a trip to the bathroom. We all jump out at once and rush her friend, who then immediately collapses onto the floor, sobbing, and s******g/pissing herself.
Apparently she had been kidnapped by her biological father and his friends as a child, who more or less did the same thing in a similar fashion. And I didn't even know that until many years later, for years I thought she was just embarrassed that she crapped her pants. What was 100% a 14 year old's innocent idea to jump scare my girlfriend's group of friends turned into a nightmare of resurfaced trauma and embarrassment among her peers for a young girl.
I still feel f*****g horrible for it to this day
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#11I tricked a kid out of seconds at lunch. He looked so sad when he asked why I would do that. School bully came up and told me I was an a*****e because the kids parents didn't feed him.
I think about that alot and it was almost 40 years ago.
Image credits: Vorpak
#12I bullied a girl in middle school to the point that she had to transfer to the school in the next town over to get away from me.
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Nine years old is when many kids start to push against their parents’ rules. Around this age, children start to value their friendships over their relationships with their parents, so they’ll start to keep secrets and develop inside jokes. Their capacity to be selfish and argumentative will increase. Once they hit ten to eleven years old, they will become even more clever and might try to explain or justify their bad behavior. They’ll search for a loophole in any rule and might be a bit sassier. Karen recommends parents let kids this age push the boundaries in safe ways. “Let them try different things, express their own opinions, and make their own decisions when appropriate,” she writes. “Know where your boundaries are and be ready to implement consequences when they make a bad decision. Make the consequence about their behavior, not about who they are.”
#13So back in junior high one of my classmates Chris told me that his friend Leon asked him out. Me being young and ignorant didn’t believe this to be true so I confronted Leon and asked him are you gay? Leon replied “Who told you this?” I told him Chris did. He turned white and I didn’t see him throughout the whole day. I heard ambulances but didn’t think much of it. He came back a couple of days later. Told me that the rumor wasn’t true but was noticeably hostile towards me for the rest of the school year.
Fast forward 5 years I then found out through mutual friends that he was actually gay and after I confronted him he went to the top of the school building intended to jump. Thank God he didn’t. Still feel bad to this day.
Image credits: GumShoos
#14Saying no when my brother asked for a hug.
My brother is 2 years younger than me. When we were little our mum was clearly struggling with taking care of us as well as herself ( she suffered with a few mental health issues as well as being a single mother at the time). Because of this she would take her anger and stress out on us by getting mad at the tiniest things. Basically had to walk on egg shells around her. One day she got mad at my brother for something and yelled as she usually did which left my brother in tears ( he was about 6/7 at the time) I came out of my room to check on him and he asked me if he could have a hug. The other kids at my school said it was embarrassing to hug your family members so thinking about this I replied to him with a no and with a disgusted tone of voice and expression. I don’t know why I did that. I regret it so much. He needed support and I let my fear of people thinking I was weird get in the way even when they weren’t there. I wish I could tell him that I’m sorry but we’re not really close enough to have that kind of convocation. I try not to be too hard on myself about that choice I made since I was only 8/9 at the time and didn’t have the emotional maturity I have now.
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#15Back in elementary school, I was one of the students who had many friends. I was what you would call the "class clown". There was this kid who was darker in color than us and stank bad when going to school. As a kid who didn't know much back then, I used to make fun of him for the way he looked and smelled bad. I bullied him every day, and because I'm friends with the whole class, they would too. Little did I know that that boy was selling little packets of pepper before and after school hours. That's why he smelled and looked that way. As a little kid who needs to work like that, it's a pity that we made fun of him because he wanted to earn money. I'm [angry] at myself for that.
Image credits: Wise_Admiral
Once kids reach adolescence, it’s expected that they start to form their own rules. They might become overly concerned with how they are perceived, so they will experiment with their identity, their image, and how to be “cool”. Karen writes, “What their peers think of them will be a source of stress to them for a while, peaking for girls at age 13 and for boys at age 15. They might go to extra lengths to try to fit in with their peers. This might involve making silly decisions or putting themselves in risky situations. Breathe. It will end.”
They may seem extremely emotional or closed off, but Karen explains that they “need love and connection more than ever”. She recommends helping teenagers find safe outlets to take risks in, such as sports or competitive hobbies. “The truth is that when it comes to adolescence, we have no control,” Karen explains. “They will decide how much they involve you in their lives, how much they tell you, and how much influence you have. Make it easy for them to come to you when something happens or when they need guidance.”
#16When I was 13-14 I was at a sale barn auction for cattle. All of us young teens would help herd cattle down the lanes and thought we were hot stuff. At a cattle sale we all wore boots and jeans because cows c**p anywhere they want. There was some girl there that evening that was hanging out with us. I noticed she was very cautious of where she stepped and refused to walk in the middle of the lanes because of the mud/poop. She had a newish pair of tennis shoes on. I said something along the lines of "what kind of person wears tennis shoes to a sale barn?" She got really quiet and said "they're the only ones I have". I shot back and said "well thats just stupid." Over 15 years later I still hurt in my heart for what I said. Can't believe I made fun of a girl that wanted to hang out with us and didn't have more than one pair of shoes.
Image credits: Glorifiedpillpusher
#17When I was 6 I made fun of the fact my dad didn't know how to speak English when he first came to the United States little did i know just how hard he worked to give me and my sister the life he always wanted I still feel horrible to this day
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#18Back when I was a kid in the 60s, playground safety didn't exist. We had this aluminum slide in the communal playground that was surrounded by concrete. One day, when I was about 8 or 9, I noticed a lot of commotion at the slide. There was a boy, about two or three, who was next to slide but was refusing. There was a line of kids behind him, yelling at him to go but he just wouldn't move. I got tired of the yelling so I made all the kids move, climbed up to him, and tried to lift him to either slide him down or carry him down, whatever would work. He refused to let me lift him, and instead, climbed over the side of the slide so that he was hanging by his hands. It was a long drop (at least 6 to 8 feet) down to the concrete below. I tried pulling him up, but he was too heavy. I and all the other kids panicked and ran to the other side of the playground, leaving him to his fate. Fortunately, one of the high school boys playing football beside the playground noticed the kid dangling and jumped the playground fence and caught him when the kid finally lost his grip. The high school boy yelled at us for not helping him, and I felt a mix of anger and shame that even today I still think about sometimes.
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We all have moments in our lives that we wish we could take back. Whether it was saying the wrong thing at the worst moment or making a rash decision when emotional that you regret after calming down, we could all benefit from a time machine. But the important thing to keep in mind once we have made an error is to forgive ourselves. We can understand the gravity of a situation and vow to never make the same mistake again without torturing ourselves for decades to come. After all, if we never forgive ourselves, we will never be in a place to better help others. So to get some tips for moving forward, we consulted a piece that Kendra Cherry wrote for Verywell Mind titled “Taking the Steps to Forgive Yourself”.
#19When I was six (in the early 80’s for clarity) I caused a clog in the toilet from pooping that backed up somehow into the furnace room and sewage came out of the drain in the furnace room, it was a total mess and plumbers galore came and my parents were so upset (not at me just the situation) but it embarrassed me so much and I was so afraid of it happening again, until I was like 12 and old enough to realize I was being dumb about it I snuck outside at night to poop in various bushes around the house. Years later as an adult my parents mentioned they thought they had a homeless problem in the neighborhood at one time because they kept finding dried human feces when doing yard work. I guiltily confessed and they laughed their asses off but my Mom said she (only half-jokingly) would have killed me if she’d caught me doing it at the time.
Image credits: TriscuitCracker
#20An older kid in the neighborhood wanted to light a fire, and I didn't tell anyone about it but instead joined him as he did so. Then, when the fire got a lot bigger than I thought, he convinced me to lie to the cops/firemen about what had happened & I did.
I was in elementary school and he was in middle or high school? I don't remember exactly, but in hindsight there was an element of coercion that I only recognize now, so yeah. Arson, technically.
And I shoplifted from my elementary school store. They weren't even things I needed.
#21When I was about 16 (about 1979), I learned how to rip off cigarette machines. They used to have 'em where you'd put your 75 cents in and pull a long handle out, under whatever brand of smokes you wanted, push it back in, and the cigarettes would come out in a tray at the bottom of the machine. Come to find out, it's not hard to defeat these. Well, there's probably 20 different brands in a machine, and maybe 10 packs of each brand in there. I didn't just rip off a pack of Marlboros. No, I boosted 'em all. Virginia Slims, Newports, Salems, Camels, Winstons and whatever else was in there. Me and all my friends were smoking like a tar kettle. I was in the gas station where I did that when the guy who owned the machine came to refill it. He saw what happened and was, understandably, totally pissed. Older me realizes that doing that was an actual crime and makes me a d**k petty criminal. Young me just thought it was a lark!
Kendra writes that the Four R’s of Self-Forgiveness are responsibility, remorse, restoration, and renewal. First and foremost, we must accept responsibility for our actions. What’s done is done, and we can’t deny what we said or did. Next, expressing remorse is important. But Kendra warns to not get caught up in feeling shame. “While guilt implies that you're a good person who did something bad, shame makes you see yourself as a bad person. This can bring up feelings of worthlessness which, left unresolved, can lead to addiction, depression, and aggression,” she explains. “Understand that making mistakes that you feel guilty about does not make you a bad person or undermine your intrinsic value.”
#22Stole a bunch of money from my mom’s purse to buy a stuffed soccer ball from Spencer’s Gifts.
#23Stole this little kid’s toy sword and shield and then dumped it in the trash. His teeth were really messed up so it's likely those toys weren't something his family could easily afford. Completely innocent little boy who had done absolutely nothing to me. I was about 7 at the time.
I still remember the look on his face as he was crying and I feel terrible about it whenever this thought pops up in my head.
#24I made a yo mama joke to my friend the week his mom died.
I knew about it, I just had totally forgot. I remembered the second it came out of my mouth.
The next step is focusing on repairing and restoring any trust or relationships that were damaged. Another person does not have to accept your apology, but you will feel much less guilty if you do apologize. It can be verbal, handwritten or via the internet, but the important thing is that it’s sincere. “It may seem as if this portion of the process benefits only the person you've harmed, but there's something in it for you as well,” Kendra writes. “Fixing your mistake means you'll never have to wonder if you could have done more.”
Lastly, focus on renewal. You have learned a hard lesson, but it’s time to move on. Focus on what you can do in the future to not only prevent this from happening again, but to do the opposite. Make decisions that will empower yourself and others, and look towards the future.
#25I drowned two puppies. Their eyes weren't even open yet and i was probably 8 or so. I was trying to bottle-raise them and I held them like I saw my mom hold my little brother to give him bottles. Turns out if you hold the puppy on its back and feed them "Like a baby", the formula goes into their lungs. They have to eat with four paws on the ground. I didn't realize any of this until many years later. I still remember burying them in the front yard.
#26Tied a kid to a tree and peed on him. It's wasn't my idea I was just a part of it.
#27At a church I went to, there were stacks of the boxes that you filled with goodies and gave to children in need. I did not know what these were, so I opened one and took a bouncy ball out of it. About a year later when it came time to do the boxes again and I learned what they really were, I realized that I had stolen some kid's bouncy ball. I felt guilty every time I saw those boxes from that point on.
Image credits: Mario_hat_with_eyes
Everyone makes mistakes, especially kids. I can’t tell you how many times I wished I had a time machine. By opening up about shameful parts of their past, the people who contributed to this list showed great vulnerability. Remember to be understanding in the comments, and continue to upvote all of the answers that stand out the most to you. Then feel free to open up about any past mistakes you want to move on from down below; I'm sure your fellow pandas will understand. We're all just doing our best.
#28I hated ants so much as a kid. I used to drown them in a tall container using glue. I felt weird about it then but now I'm mortified
#29telling my brother i wished i was an only child. he's my only friend now
#30When I was 4-9 I spent a lot of Saturday and Sunday mornings as an only child trying to entertain myself while waiting for my dad to wake up. One morning I was terrorizing the cat by chasing him around the house, not giving him any time to breath. He got so scared and tired he hid behind the dryer where he stayed for almost 2 hours. My dad asked where the cat was, and I told him I didn’t know. I was a d**k and it wasn’t the first time I did that kind of thing, but for some reason that one made me realize what I was actually doing to that beautiful creature. I thought I was just playing with my brother. I think about it quite often and have never treated an animal that way since. It does haunt me the way I behaved towards that animal that gave nothing but love and affection.
Image credits: Trails2Tomorrow
#31I picked on a kid with autism in middle school. I didn’t know that about him, I just picked on him one day because he was an easy target. If you knew me, it was totally out of character to bully anybody. I wrote him an apology letter the next day and felt terrible about it for years.
Image credits: Looks_at_this_clown
#32I filled my hand with black pepper and blew it into my mom and sister's faces in the middle of a nice restaurant because I thought it wound just make them sneeze like in the cartoons. Their faces turned bright red, eyes watering and my sister started loudly crying. I was left alone in at the table with everyone looking at me and wondering that the hell just happened.
#33Blaming my brother for pooping in the sink when it was me
Image credits: Mr_P_scientist
#34You might wanna brace yourself for this one...
When I was like 5, I was playing with one of our kittens, maybe a month or two old, unsupervised. I've repressed what I was actually doing with it, but I do remember noticing it was bleeding from the nose and was obviously being too rough. I brought it to my Mum in tears, and I'll never forget the way she yelled "What the f**k!" in that shaky, cry-scream, voice. I dunno what became of it, but I'm pretty sure I accidentally killed it. I don't even have the heart to ask my Mum about it to confirm or deny it, and I still cry about it every time I think about it. I wish I could erase what I did, go back and prevent what happened, but I can't, and I'll forever live with that guilt. It's one of the primary reasons I can't bring myself to believe I'm a good person, no matter how much I've grown in the 17ish years since, because if I can, at my most innocent stage of life, do something like that, can I ever wash that blood from my hands, what will I say to whatever, if anything, greets me after I die? I am so terribly sorry for what I did, and honestly, wouldn't disagree with you calling me inhuman for my actions.
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#35My Nana raised me...My mom had a bad past but she's here for me now and into my adult life. But one moment I wish I could take back was when I was 13, (My Nana moved to Vegas at this point so we were distant)... I was playing my Xbox, and my Nana called and called me. I never answered because apparently I didn't have the f*****g time of day for the one I looked up to growing up. Later I find out she wasn't feeling good, she had phones my mother...and she went to the hospital the same night and passed away. I wish I could have has the brains to pick up the phone and talk to her. I never knew that would be the last time I would see her, and it was a simple phone call. All I had to do was pick up. And I'll always have that in my heart, just how careless I was for someone that still wanted to be a part of my life even if she was miles away.
#36I used to be a real brat. One of those “gives completely unsolicited opinions because I’m just so HONEST” type assholes. I one time in like 4th grade went up to this group of girls, singled one of them out by name, and told her, “Gina, you’re not fat but you’re chubby.”
I in no way did this to be mean. It was just my complete ignorance about how since I had a thought, she needed to hear it. I had no friends.
It didn’t dawn on me til years later when I eventually pulled my head out of my a*s that I realized what a horrible person I used to be and didn’t know it in the slightest.
Image credits: HarrisonRyeGraham
#37I was friends with unpopular kids growing up. To protect my own image, I didn’t defend against their bullying when I was around. They never ever seemed to mind, but my cowardice haunts me to this day.
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#38For our class Halloween party in 3rd grade, I dressed up as a “pop star”. The costume’s top was slightly cropped, showing a bit of my stomach. When we were sitting at the carpet, the girl sitting next to me said, “You’re not supposed to wear anything that shows your stomach.” Without even thinking, I shot back, “Yeah, well you’re not supposed to wear the same clothes two days in a row.”
As an adult, I now realize her family was likely extremely poor and wearing the same clothes two days in a row was probably not by choice. Sorry, Dakota?
Image credits: EllieD0113
#39Stole and destroyed a neighbors bike then just left it out in the street and denied any knowledge when their parents knocked our door having seen us taking it.
Don't know why I did it.
After later reflection decided never to do anything like it again and felt like a c**t.
Image credits: Bucket_head
#40In middle school my best friend had a crush on the same person as me. That person had rejected me and very much distanced themself from me. So when I found out she also liked them I basically encouraged her to tell them how she felt. She did and the same things happened to her that happened to me. Not long after she moved and we lost touch. She didn’t deserve that pain, but I was in so much so I gave it to her. I wish I could apologize, but I really have no idea how to find her.
Image credits: Runawaytothelake
#41I purposely bullied a kid because he sounded weird when he talked. I regret every moment of it. To Johnathan, wherever you are....I'm sorry for being an a*****e for no reason and making 4th grade suck as a result. You didn't deserve any of it.
Image credits: Cheetodude625
#42I repeated a lot of horrible, untrue gossip I heard from the adults about other family members. I still cringe everytime I think about it.
#43I was seeing a child therapist as my parents discovered there was something ‘off’ with me at 14. I just kept shut in, kept missing out.
Now, 16 years of depression, and 4 years of therapy later I realize I probably wasn’t ready to help myself out at the time, I just miss all those years, and most of my childhood gone
#44I spit in someone's drink when they weren't looking an they drank that..
#45Ugh...I terrorized so many small animals.
Dropped a baby chick down a sewer pipe at the Zoo when I was like 3.
Plucked all the feathers out of my sister's cockatiel.
Accidentally killed my pet rat and pet parakeet by jumping on them. around age 4.
Parents, do not give pets to kids that young without supervision.
I have treated all my pets past that age with great care and gentleness and will do everything in my power for their health and comfort. I just didn't comprehend pain and death yet.
#46When I was a kid I had a weird obsseion with cicadas. I would catch them and take their wings off. So they couldn't fly away. I feel like a piece of s**t about it now obviously. I never tortured any other kind of animal and I don't even like killing cockroaches or spiders etc, so, yeah.
#47Back in 7th grade there was a group of girls that I would mock constantly just for being women. I had no idea why and no one was influencing me to do it. I’m now in my second year of college and I look back on it occasionally and I’m grateful I’m not that person anymore
#48Kissed my brother on the lips cause i saw two kids kiss each other in a movie and i thought they were brothers and sisters and i thought it was ok.
#49Bit our dog in the ear, to see how hard I could bite before it squeaked. Felt terrible right away as soon as it did.
#50Me and a neighborhood boy threw tomatoes from my mom's garden in the neighbors swimming pool.
The boy had a jack knife and was cutting them up before he threw them.
When the neighbor asked my parents about it I lied and said it wasn't me.
I finally gave in and confessed and my parents made me go ring the doorbell and apologize.
The things we do as kids....?
#51I was new to a group of boys at a party. I threw a frisbee poorly and it went into a pool. Asked another guy to get it for me. He said no. I called him a racial slur. He got out of the pool, lifted me up over his head WWF style, and threw me into the pool. (He should have beat the c**p out of me). I lied about what happened saying he hurt me, and he got kicked out of the party. He never came back to that group and I have no idea whatever happened to him. That is probably my biggest regret of all time. I wish I could apologize to him.
#52All the kids would call this girl "germenes", which means germs in Spanish. She was not pretty, poor girl got bullied alot. She also always smelled like pee. My Spanish has always sucked. I would also call her germenes, not knowing I was insulting her because I didn't know what that was. I guess I thought it was her name? I think she thought I did that on purpose. Poor Jasmine
#53Bullying people for being "different".
Been more than 10 years and I still feel bad I just wish I could go in the past and unsay/undo everything I said/done.
I promised myself to never bully someone again and raise my kid the best way I can for them to be nice with anyone.
#54I killed a butterfly with a hammer when I was around 4 years old. I can still see it clearly, on the white wooden post where it landed peacefully. I can still feel my emptiness of mind as I lifted my hand to kill it.
#55it was not really my fault, so i don't *blame* myself for it, but i still think about it and wish i could go back and change it.
i was a difficult kid because i had panic disorder, and would go through periods of time where i would have panic attacks daily, sometimes more than once per day. i externalized them and would hyperventilate, sob, pace, self harm, etc. this made it really difficult for me to be in class or in public.
one day i had a nasty and disruptive attack at home, and my dad, who was handling a space heater, threw the space heater to the ground in frustration. he was not a violent man and had never thrown anything before or since. it startled me but did not really make an impression on me one way or the other.
shortly after, i was at school and had a meeting with a guidance counselor, who i met with weekly to brainstorm coping mechanisms to help me stay in class and be less disruptive at school. i was lamenting being a source of frustration for people, and mentioned offhand that my dad had thrown the heater. the guidance counselor latched onto it. she kept asking leading questions, and the same questions in different ways, trying to seemingly trick me into saying that he had thrown the heater at me, or in my direction, or at least *thrown* it, like horizontally. i kept insisting that he had not thrown the heater *at* me, that he had *never* thrown anything at me, and he had *not* thrown it like a projectile. he threw it down and that was all. it was irritating because i felt like she wasn't listening to me, but i forgot about it as soon as i left her office.
turns out the guidance counselor reported my dad to social services for "throwing a space heater at me." me and my family had a distressing few days where we wondered how social services might react. i was terrified of the thought of me and my brother being taken away from my family. my dad, who i was very close to and who was *not* abusive at all and never had been, was terrified as well. both of my parents understandably thought i had lied to the guidance counselor about what happened, which had to have hurt them.
in the end, nothing came of it--i think social services did end up talking with my dad but realized he wasn't a threat and let it go.
did she do something wrong? i'm not objectively sure. i get that people who work at public schools are mandated reporters, i get that sometimes you can't get straight answers from kids, i think it's VERY important to listen to kids and take them seriously when they raise alarms, and she was probably in the right to raise concern. but the extent to which she used leading and manipulative questions to try and trick me into admitting to abuse *that literally wasn't happening,* and then falsely reporting it as abuse *anyway,* caused us an enormous amount of trauma as a family, and had some negative (thankfully not lasting) impacts on my relationship with my dad at the time. i harbor resentment for her even 20 years later and regret saying anything to her. it made me incredibly distrustful of authority figures and terrified that my words, even offhand words, would be twisted and used against me, and it took me a LONG time to accept any help from adults because of her.
#56I called my sister a "pregnant s**t" when I was like 11 for literally no reason. She was just trying to say goodbye before going home. Still can't find a reason for why I said it
#57I was maybe 7 or 8, riding in the car with my mom. She was going to make some vegetarian dish for dinner, and I wanted something else (probably, like, ravioli or similarly boring). We were arguing about it because I would NOT let it go, and I said, "If I eat it, it'll be gross. It'll probably make me sick, it'll make me want to vomit!"
She got really quiet, and then said in a very small voice, "Well, it's the best thing I can make."
Oh my god, I felt like a heel then and I still do now. My poor mother.
#58I stabbed a kid in the neck with a pencil once when I was in middle school. Not hard enough to make him bleed or anything, just enough so he felt significant pain.
I don't even remember why I did it, but man did I get in trouble with the math teacher. Sorry Caleb, I was a complete f*****g idiot. Hope your neck's doing okay.
#59I was playing in a swamp where I used to catch frogs and lizards and found a bird nest. I stole the only egg in it and when I showed it to my stepdad he reached out to grab it making a noise like he was going to eat it because it looked like a chocolate easter egg. I dropped it and it broke. I still think about it sometimes. I remember like it was yesterday. A drizzly tuesday.
#60Left the house doors wide open when I left for school and we ended up getting robbed
#61In 4th grade I cut a hole in my friends sweater while everyone was at recess because she was my best friend and she was excluding me from some game
#62When I was about 8 years old, my parents were going out and the babysitter was coming over to watch me.
The House we were living in at the time had a second floor window that was directly above the front door of the house.
I waited quietly at the second floor window for the babysitter to arrive, and when she got to the front door, I dumped a huge bucket of water on her from the second floor window. She screamed, and was completely soaked.
Sorry about that, babysitter...
#63Hit a cat with a stick. Basically, cat in the local area got friendly withe me, followed me a lot. One day we got a dog. "Wait, dogs eat cats, I don't want this cat to get eaten. How can I get them to stop following me? I know, scare them away."
So I picked up a stick, started waving it around, nothing. Near it's face, nothing. Bit closer, stoic as you like. Eventually? *Clunk*... In retrospect, not my brightest moment, I could've done a lot of damage. Thankfully they were fine, if a bit spooked at first.
#64I feel like I was an a*****e to my little sister. It was the stereotypical Sister vs brother accept I actually despised her. My friends would even make comments about it sometimes. One time that still sticks out to me was when I was 9, i was at a birthday party and was sitting with my friends and she came over to the table because she didnt have any friends there and I told her to go away. She didnt even cry, just looked sad and I even felt like a Peice of s**t for it at the time. I still apologize to her for it a lot now. Honestly feel pretty awful because most Older brothers actually treated their sisters well. I treated her better More when I got older though which is good
#65Me and a few kids in my street were having a "who could make the grosses bucket" challange. I obviously pared up with my best friend. We put things like dirt, snails, worms, moss, etc into the bucket. When we only had a few minutes left she complained about needing the bathroom. I , being the incredibly smart child I was, told her to pee into the bucket. She did but she also got it all over her clothing and had to change. Safe to say we won the challange.
Oh, and for some reason she is still my best friend. She regularly talks about this and has to tell it to every new person we meet.
#66I went to push the shopping cart in the corral and tried pushing it to make it go inside..like making a goal. Instead the shopping cart turned randomly and hit a car. I ran and hid inside the car because I was scared. They came over to the car where my mom apologized and asked me to come out and say sorry but I refused because anxiety. I still struggle with anxiety issues but I can apologize when I make a mistake now that I'm grown
#67Me and my neighbors played together in the summers, we ranged 5-12 one summer. I, 9ish got really mad at the 5 year old for taking my grandmas attention away from me (hello only child syndrome!) and bit her so hard. She cried but I calmed her down and she didn’t tell my grandma but that poor girl already had such a rough home life she did not deserve that at all.
#68I was not a great older brother, my younger brother was just 2 years younger than me. He always wanted to play games, kick a ball and just hang out - I never wanted to do anything with him, I preferred to stay and read in my room all day.
Now he is estranged from the family (for other reasons) but I have always felt bad for being a turd to him like that!
#69I broke the glass of a door in school by kicking it, thought i was “cool”
#70I called a kid the n word on the playground when i was in 4th grade, i dont know why i did it, i guess sometimes as children we try out cruelty and some of us like it and some of us, like myself, are haunted by how his face fell hearing my words and never do it again. we became friends later but i imagine he has always held some reservations. i hope not but it would be understandable and deserved.
#71Ghosted a friend, feel like a damn douche.
#72I threatened another kid with a knive to impress my friends. Instead they told me I was an a*****e. It's what friends are for.
#73There were a pile of blankets on the couch so I ran and jumped into them knee first… right into my napping great grandmother’s stomach. It was an accident but I still feel terrible about it.
#74I told my mom she had a mom butt, and now I have a mom butt. ?
#75I threw our kitten pretty far and he landed hard. He was fine except for getting the wind knocked out of him. I think this was in second or third grade. I'm 39 now and still think about it sometimes.
#76Whinging that I could not beat my friend in Pokémon Stadium. He felt so bad he picked Pokémon with none damaging attacks (tail whip, sand attack, etc) and only used them until I won. I felt so hollow after I have never let losing push me that far again. Now I just give up and quit.
I quit a lot.
#77Break and enters, car theft and assaults to list a few.
I have spent my adult life being a good man helping as many people as I can. Trying to find a sinners back door into heaven.